Thursday, November 10, 2011

Your reputation precedes you

"Your reputation precedes you..." Well, maybe one day it actually will!
At least it will be a sassy one :-)

One year ago today I wrote and posted my first blog post. Its theme centered around a song by Ezra Furman & the Harpoons called "Take Off Your Sunglasses" because it was my way of saying "Oh hey World, meet Sassarella!" It was a short, quick, and to the point post that took me hours to write. I spent hours on it because I wanted it to be perfect. I wanted it to make the right statement without being too much of a big deal. I was unsure of my writing, my ability to entertain, and how I felt about posting information about my life on the Internet. I was unsure of how people would respond, if anyone other than my parents would read it, and if I'd even be able to keep it going. Now it's a year later, (can you believe it?!) and I'm still going strong. In fact, I believe I get stronger with every post. Of course some are better than others, it's all about the mood I'm writing in, but it's amazing to see the difference between the earlier posts to now.


I've analyzed, criticized, and hashed out the entire last year of my life through this blog. There is not much that I haven't shared, some things here and there, but for the most part I've put it all out there. My best and most popular posts are usually based on painful experiences. I think they are the best because I have a lot of deep rooted emotions that I can express on here. I usually find some gut-wrenching quote that nails it on the head or a picture that says it all, which makes it fun for me to create a cohesive post. And I think they are the most popular because I sometimes turn that pain into funny anger. These posts are usually very Sassarella-esque and are fun to read. I also think they are the most popular because they usually have something to do with my love life and who wants to read about a happy person in love? That's just boring. Good thing that hasn't happened all year. Anyway, my point is that pain is popular and inspiring so it is rare that a person, artist, writer, or in particular a woman compliments herself. I guess it's not all that polite to announce why you're fabulous but sometimes it feels a little funny that people are more interested in my pain. That being said, I'm taking a g.d. minute to compliment myself and you're all gonna like it!

"Sassarella Says..." changed the way I think and I love that there's always more going on in my head than people realize. In the silliest and most common of situations, I'm always making mental notes. I find inspiration in unexpected ways, most recent example being "you're the worst." A situation that means nothing to one person could mean an entire blog post to me. I love that about me. It keeps the wheels in motion and it makes me feel like I know some big secret that those around me do not.

In my own world all the time.

I love how honest I am. What good is a blog if you aren't being completely honest with your readers....or better yet, with yourself. I have an outlet for my thoughts, my experiences, and my emotions that most people do not. I love that I get positive, encouraging, and supportive feedback on my thoughts, experiences, emotions, and how I write about them. I love how putting all the bisque into a blog post instantly makes me feel a bit more free. People ask me all the time if my family ever says anything about how I blatantly write about sex and partying. I understand where the questioning comes from but what the hell fun or interesting would a blog be if I pretended like I didn't date or drink? Why would you read about a bad dating experience (or a good one for that matter) if I didn't tell you what actually happened despite the fact that it might embarrass or hurt me? Think about it.

How do you think my family feels about the word "balls" in a post?

I love that I don't always have to tell everyone everything that happens because they can read about it instead. I'm not a big phone talker, there are exceptions of course, but in general I'm not one to catch up for hours with anyone other than my mom or Lauren. It's just the way it is. I like that everyone else still feels like they know what's up because they read my shizzz. I feel a little out of the loop sometimes though I guess. Hmm.

I love that I can connect to a wide range of readers. Older, younger, male, female, I got 'em all! People I haven't talked to in years tell me that they read my blog. Former classmates and teammates have contacted me over the last year telling me how much they enjoy and relate to "Sassarella Says..." and I love it. Over homecoming weekend, a few Hoyas who I wasn't even sure remembered my freakin' name got drunk and told me how they read it all the time! Some feel weird or embarrassed to tell me that they read it, which is ridiculous because that's the whole point! Read and enjoy, people.

I love that I have the last year of my life documented. I read back on it sometimes and thoroughly enjoy laughing out loud at crazy times and even crying to hard times. It's my past, we all have one. I love that I am detail-oriented and meticulous enough to jot down funny quotes from a night out and work them into a post. When I go back to these posts, I can put myself right back into that moment.

I love that "Sassarella Says..." didn't start as "Sassarella Says..." because I really had no idea how much it would take off. I love that it started as no big deal and now I know how much it changed my life forever.

Pretty much sums it up.

And to repeat myself, I love that I have found a way to feel alive. Even if it only lasts for the few hours a week that I'm writing or in the few seconds it takes to see that 170 people have read a post, it makes me feel alive. It makes me feel accomplished, it makes me feel sassy and smart, and it makes me feel like I'm at least good at something! Kidding...but not?

Oh em gee, there's the other b-word!

Sassarella Says...happy one year anniversary, Sassarella! I want to congratulate you on completing a year's worth of posts. It's quite an accomplishment considering I haven't yet figured out how to make this my full-time job. Anyway, there ya have it, kids. A year of highs and quite a few lows but usually learning something in the process. And hey, if I'm not learning something, well at least I have a place to Sassarella-style vent about it!

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